Some of “you” know that we’re preparing to be career missionaries in N’Djamena, Chad (a short video of what we’ll be doing is on our “About” page, if this is news to you.) And the whole experience has just been weird.
Once we started having kids, our “plans” were to live in our little house in quiet Stanwood, Washington forever & go through sports leagues & graduations & grand-kids… the whole “American Dream” thing. Then our “plans” got weird.
God began moving in our hearts through His Word & through books & sermons, and before we knew it our “plans” changed & we were considering giving them all up to follow Him to some city we couldn’t pronounce in a country we’d never heard about. Definitely weird.
What’s even weirder (if that’s even a word, which it apparently is because spell-check hasn’t told me differently) is that as we started giving up these “plans” and these “things” that we thought we couldn’t live without, God began showing us that He is actually better than any plan we could come up with and He’s MORE satisfying that any thing we could own. All things we knew in our heads, but never had the opportunity to experience in our hearts & daily lives.
So more weirdness ensued (can’t believe “weirdness” is a word…) – we left our house & sold NEARLY everything we own – literally E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G! We’re down to beds, clothes, & memorabilia. Utter weirderocity! (ha! Take THAT spell-check!) And, it’s actually really freeing and feels really nice! You should try it!
Believe it or not, even more weirdness came as friendships started to change. We knew this would happen once we left, but it has consistently been weird to see this change happen so prematurely. And, it’s totally understandable, knowing that we’ll soon be gone people will move on & try to replace us so that they can go on with their lives.
The hard part of this equation (as we’ve now experienced & have read in books) is that we won’t replace them! We’ll still hold onto them as our dear friends and everything will stay the same (in our minds) and then we’ll find that they’ve gone through life almost as if we don’t exist & we’ll go through life looking forward to getting back to relationships as they used to be! A weird paradigm indeed.
But, through all this weirdness, God has been more than gracious to us to fill in the gaps in our hearts as we’ve let go of “plans” & dreams & friendships & Americana and He’s replaced it with exactly what He’s said – peace. God is so cool. And we’re just ready – we’re ready to go, ready to follow Him to a country that no one wants to go to, we’re ready to say our “good-byes”, and we’re ready for our lives to get even weirder.